Tik Tok

"I gotta fly once, I gotta try once; only can die once, right sir? Oh life is juicy, juicy and you see, I gotta have my bite, sir."

As mixed as my feelings are about Barbara Streisand, there is no denying that "Don't Rain on My Parade" is a powerhouse and has been revived thanks to Lea Michele and Glee. I've been listening to that song a lot. There's something about it that's helping me get through my "OMGI'MASENIORINCOLLEGE" crisis.

I know it's been a while, let's play catch up. Tom and I are no longer friends. Tom put his girlfriend before our friendship and hasn't talked to me since I responded wrongly to news that she hit a deer. For the record, Gertrude is fine and didn't do any damage and probably hurt the deer more than her car, but I let out a chuckle and we're no longer friends. We haven't talked since February. Rude.

Ever since Tom and I stopped talking, I've done a lot of soul searching and figuring out of who I am, especially since I didn't entirely like who I was when we were friends. It's sad that we're not friends anymore; it's always sad when a friendship ends, but I'm really...not that bent out of shape about it. There are times it's a little strange, but when things go wrong...I'm not sure I'll be there for him (I'm not sure I can forgive him), and that's what makes me a little sad.

Oh well, like I said before (and many times before) this is the summer devoted to me. I'm determined to get back into shape after letting myself go for a semester and just get in some me time. I'm not working too much because BBW doesn't have enough hours, so I've been working out and reading, just as life should be in the summer.

My mom and I are still debating my post graduation plans; she wants me to stay and I want to leave. I need to leave. I think it's important and Pittsburgh doesn't really offer what I want, but...moving to a big city, moving to New York City, kind of scares me.

We'll see.

"Tik Tok" by Ke$ha; 2009